Why Men Need To Know About Menopause
I bet you’re wondering what do I need to know? It’s not me going through it. You couldn’t be more wrong. This is a change that takes years to get through and its a lot. In a relationship ,we don’t go through anything alone.
The things I am about to tell you here will maybe clarify and possibly save your life!
Menopause affects different women in different ways. Some women don’t suffer much and some suffer a lot. The symptoms tend to be similar though in most of the women I’ve talked to and what I found in my research.
I can really only relay the facts and my experience. I am 48 and it started for me around 43, which I am told is pretty early but for some women ,it can start even earlier. It started out mildly. I would sweat like crazy at night and that was it, really.
I thought wow, I am not going to be my mother, who was a complete lunatic. She would call crying and not knowing why. Well, now I know.
Well, I was so wrong. I am hot all the time and that isn’t counting the hot flashes. What is the hardest for me is the Mood Swings? I can be laughing one minute and the next bawling my eyes out. It has taken Anxiety to whole new level. I have felt at times like I was going crazy. I thought PMS was bad. Seems like a picnic now and I am still two years out at least. Don’t think I don’t have a Menopause Party planned!
I chose not to go the route of Hormone Therapy because of the links to Cancer. Breast Cancer is in my family and I can’t take the risk. What does work for me is a healthy diet, exercise and Black Cohosh.
My husband is very supportive. He listens but it occurred to me that I could do more to broaden the understanding.
This Is Not The Woman I Married
One thing you have to understand is, we can’t help it. We know it’s going on and we really wish we could control it, but at times it is just impossible. We know as Men , you want to fix our problems, but this isn’t fixable. So I have a few pieces of advice.
Educate yourself! Know what is going on in your partner’s body,it really helps you to understand and even be of help to her. There is this feeling of isolation despite the fact we know every woman is going through it. Learning the symptoms goes a long way to knowing how you can help.
Get used to the cold! I need it to be cold when I sleep. Hot flashes are the worst, it actually feels like your body is on fire from the inside. So pile on the blankets if you need to. Many women have so much trouble sleeping, that if she needs it cold then that’s how it has to be.
Maybe the hardest change is our Libido. Many experience a Low Libido, among other sexual issues. Where we might have been active, now it takes more to get there. I can see how that would be frustrating for a man. Sex is going to change and you have to change with it.
Even feeling sexy for a woman can be difficult during the change. There can be a weight gain for one thing and an overall feeling of not being attractive anymore.
I hope this helped, even a little. The best thing you can do if your partner is going through Menopause is an active participant. I can’t tell you how much it means to know you understand and honestly want to be a part of it.